Streets of...

springishere
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

I'm here in Philadelphia now, been quite busy with work the past few days. Having fun with some great colleagues, though.

I left my damn digital camera at home, and that really sucks. So I'm leaving you peeps with one I took at home on Easter Sunday. The violets and buttercups and dandelions in my backyard are starting to bloom, and you know what that means- the days are getting longer, and I'll probably be riding every day once I get home.

Enjoy the warm weather if you got it... it's sure cold here.


-t

Happy Easter

There's nothing quite like being drunk before noon because you were out of non-alcoholic beverages, when you have to be at the airport at 3 and haven't yet packed a thing.

I love Easter.

-t

Philly Bound

glow
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

Last night was a good one. The moon was in rare form over downtown Maryville. I got a few great shots from the back balcony of Brackin's, while I had some good drinks with some great friends.

Doing laundry and packing up tonight for the trip to Philly, which I've been looking forward to for various reasons. It looks like I'll be there for a week, and then home for a couple of days before I head to Vegas for the rest of the month. I'll let you guys know how it goes....

Meanwhile, I'm getting slightly irritated with all the media coverage of the whole Terri Schiavo thing. This has been the root of more internet debate and squabble than I can believe. This type of situation is not *that* uncommon, and it's a horrible position for any of them to be in, to say the least.

Now everybody and their dog has two cents to put in about it, while most of them know little or nothing about the situation, except for what they heard on the news last night. If it weren't for the ridiculous hype, I bet you the guy who tried to have Michael Schiavo killed wouldn't have had such a bright idea in the first place.

I don't pretend to be an expert on it in any way- infact, I'd rather not hear another thing about it. I don't have a "side" on this one. All I know is that I'm doing the best I can for myself and the people I love, and since my opinion isn't worth a dime one way or the other, the best thing for me to do is to mind my own frickin business.

Any of you that have had a relative on life supporting devices should know how it is- it's a DAMN tough situation to be in, and I don't think that any one of us can actually comprehend the exact emotions that the family are dealing with. I sure wouldn't have welcomed any outside opinions when I had to make that decision. Judge not, people. It's really none of your business, anyway.

And yes, Kitty's still here, although living outside. Every time I walk out the front door, there she is. I sit on the front porch and pet her sometimes when I have a minute. Still no success with getting her and the dog to get along, but obviously that's asking a little much, as dogs and cats don't have too great a history of being best buddies. Updates soon.

Have a good one.

-t

Kitty

kitty
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

So... over the course of the past couple of hours, I have evidently been chosen by a random neighborhood cat as "Daddy." She was living in Firefighter Jake's old truck. I tried not to bring her home, but she followed me into my car. Honest. We'll just call the cat "Kitty" for now, because I'd rather not name her, and am *not* intending on keeping her. She's quite friendly, fairly clean, and seems to be in good health, but she's a bit on the emaciated side.

The cat thing in and of itself would not be an issue, as Jager LOVES kitties. The major problem arising here is Kitty's apparent aversion to dogs. Even though Jager's barely bigger than her, I think it's his general enthusiasm that scares her.

I decided not to introduce the two of them right away. I locked Jager up in the bedroom while I let Kitty get acclimated to the house, and that part went incredibly well. Kitty ate, drank, cuddled, purred, and was just generally happy as could be. She's one of the sweetest, most loving cats I've seen in a while. I put her up on the stove so she wouldn't feel too threatened when I let Jager out. Didn't work. Kitty immediately arched her back and began hissing at him, so I put him back in the bedroom. Then Kitty jumped down, curled around my legs, and began purring again. And suddenly I remembered why I'm more of a dog person.

At the moment, Kitty is in my bathroom behind the kiddie gates I bought when Jager was just a pup. He's quite distressed by the whole thing, because all he really wants to do is play with the kitty. He waits in front of the gate to see Kitty, then she pokes her head out, hisses, and goes back to hiding. Blah.

I'm not too sure how long this is gonna last. But I think in the meantime, Kitty will probably be sleeping outside while I post flyers, because I'm really not too keen on buying a litterbox and the related cat care items if I'm not planning on keeping her. She's quite the sweetie, but still a little more trouble than I'm able to take on at the moment, especially since I'm leaving this weekend for Philly, and will be gone the whole month of April with work (Vegas, baby!!).

Maybe if everything had been picturesque from the begininning with Kitty and Jager, things would be different. But I really love that dog, and I don't want stress him out. I'll post an update when something noteworthy happens. I really hope she finds a good home. Til then....


-t

Out of Breath

norcal
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

"It's funny how things make sense when you're lonely... It's funny how you want more when you're happy.."

Love those lines. Thanks, Hayden.

Sooooo, I had a pretty big weekend. Went to see Tuckaleechee Caverns again, rode the piss out of the motorcycles, spent some time in Knoxville's Old City, and took lots of photos. Saw some riding buddies up at Deal's Gap, although my favorite road, Foothills Parkway, is still closed due to landside-type activity.

Played some good music. Got a copy of Logic Pro, which has totally knocked my socks off.

One of my buddies has befriended a local law enforcement officer, which has been the source of quite a bit of comedic relief for us. The "pig" jokes are neverending. Mr. Officer was at the aforementioned buddy's house last night (on duty) as we were grilling steaks. I always knew that cops are just people too, but I've never actually spent any time with one before. I'm forever cracking up at things like, "DAAAAAMMMMN. You should've seen this chick I picked up for DUI last night. She was HOT." Then he got radioed for a car accident, radioed back that he was "tied up at the moment," and went back to watching "King of the Hill" with us. Then he looks at me and says "I love this f***in' show."

Next time, we're cooking pigs in blankets for him.

Over and out,

-t

Blogging for Jesus

austin_sunset
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

Just kidding.

I was thinking today about the integration of technology into our daily routines, since now we have Blackberrys, cell phone GPS/MP3 players, etc.... I thought of a couple of upgrades that mobile service providers can build into their phones and networks to make life a little easier for all of us, especially those of us who travel a lot. It would work kind of like GM's On*Star, using GPS to figure out your exact location and provide you with the information and services you need that are the closest to you. It would be a huge help to those in an unfamiliar area.

My idea goes like this: Let's say you want a pizza. You could dial a code like #PIZZA and get a prerecorded list of all the pizza places that deliver to your current location. You pick the one you want, press the corresponding number on your keypad, and you're automatically connected to your pizza joint of choice, who already have your location based on data delivered via the Caller-ID network. Tell them what you want, and sit back and relax.

This could work for me on *so* many levels... Here are a few more examples:

#TAXI - mostly like the pizza one, except that I don't particularly care who picks me up. Would come in particularly handy when you just walked out of a random bar in a random city, it's 4AM, you're shithoused, and there are either no taxis to be found or you're way too drunk to read the phone numbers on the taxis speeding by.

#ATM - Lets me know where the closest ATM is.

#BEER - Where is the closest pub with no cover charge and cheap Newcastle drafts?

#HOOKER - This one is pretty self-explanitory.

#STRIPPER - For when you can't afford a hooker.

#SHOWS - What good bands are playing in City X tonight? Where is the venue?

#EXCUSE - Have you ever been out and met someone who is obviously WAY more into you than you are them? Ever bought a drink for a beautiful woman who turns out to be a man? Me neither. But if you do, just dial this code to get a callback exactly 7 minutes later with a pre-recorded message giving you an "emergency" excuse to ditch them. And maybe the tab, too.

#LOAN - Dialing this code would instantly wire the desired amount of money into your bank account- pending credit approval, of course. This would come in handy for those situations where you meet that sophisticated cutie whose tastes run just a little richer than you were prepared for.

#FLOWERS - Met a hottie but just can't seem to seal the deal? Watch her melt in adoration when Jimbo the Clown walks in with a beautiful bouquet of flowers and sings her a Michael Bolton song.

#TJAYHELP - This code would automatically connect you to me (for a small fee, of course), whenever you need advice in an awkward situation. Hopefully you'll be polite, and I won't have to hang up on you.


As you can see, this program would benefit many of us at some time or another. I can think of a few functions I'd use regularly. For the sake of mankind, please email your mobile service provider with this link, and let them know how badly we need this service!!! We'll all be winners in the end.



-t

****end transmission

Currently digging:

MAKTUB, baby!!!

Plus, still lovin' me some Jeff Buckley, easttennesseeriders, Freestyle Wheelbarrowing, my GSX-R 1000, NorCal, my vice, apple gear, and many other things.

I could go on, but we want you to keep coming back.

At least we get one good day of weather...

steps
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

Today is absolutely beautiful here in East TN. The temps are hovering around 70, and there's hardly a cloud in the sky. Quite a change from the snow flurries they had initally forecasted for this weekend. It looks like tomorrow will be a little cooler with some showers, so I'm gonna savor today. There's an old saying about the weather here- If you don't like it, just wait. It'll change.

Got out on the GSX-R for a little while, but I've got too many other things to do today. I did manage to get in about 50 miles of good riding, though, so I won't complain too much. I'm in a pretty good mood.

Spent some time in the backyard with Jager, who managed to eat the one flower I've had bloom. Now I'm off to wash the cars, which need it badly. I might even take my shirt off, and get my white ass a little bit of a tan while I'm at it.

-t

The root of all evil- or as some call it, television

I was reading cnn.com today when I came across this article. It's about a guy who has made his living as a critic. He just released a new book in which he totally lambastes such heralded TV programs as "Star Trek," and basically gives his opinions on what's been good and bad in entertainment over the past 30 years or so.

That's all well and good, but it ultimately just prodded me to share my personal outlook when it comes to entertainment. First off, I don't have cable. I haven't for the past year and a half or so, and I can honestly say I don't miss it one bit. Every now and then I'll go visit a friend who has cable or satellite, and I'll get to watch a little bit- I always either find myself fully captivated and unable to gather the motivation to get up, or completely revolted. Which says a lot about the television.

When I had cable, most evenings at my house consisted of sitting in front of the TV, absorbing stupid information that I didn't want to know in the first place. When I had friends over, it would always just become a group vegging-out session. I never did much of anything else when I was at home.

Now, things are totally different. When I come home, I generally either read, pick up a guitar, or head out on the motorcycle. Much more productive than watching that same episode of "Friends" for the 4th time this month, in my opinion. I've sort of forced myself to either actively seek out my entertainment, or to create my own. Which has birthed some great new hobbies, like target shooting, fishing, shooting footage for and editing my movies, playing blues twice a week, etc, etc. And I've got to admit, I'm much happier now.

There are at least a couple of good uses for the TV, of course. I did enjoy The Learning Channel, The Discovery Channel, and good stuff like that, but it really hasn't changed my life to be without. Sometimes I'll still turn the tube on in the mornings and watch the fuzzy local news and weather before I go to work, but that's about it. Most of the time I get disgusted with all the negative stuff in the news, though. And my dog, Jager, likes it when I leave the TV on for him when I'm away. I just think that most American humans, myself included, lack the independent thinking skills necessary to discern propaganda and hidden agenda TV from real life, and from innocent fun. At least I have the intelligence to realize how not intelligent I am...

I've got some friends who swear by their Tivos, and I do like the idea of being able to watch what I want, when I want- but of course, that would involve me buying both the TiVo and the cable. And I think that money and time could be much better invested in other things, like Maker's Mark and guitars, for instance. I think I'll stick to the internet, where I can at least choose my mindless entertainment.

.... Have you ever wondered why they call it "programming?"

-t

Quote of the day: Fireman Jake said, "I was on the phone with my girlfriend, and she was standing next to George Stephanopoulos. That's awesome. I thought he was really funny in Seinfeld."

Another Late Night

blues
Originally uploaded by tjayswift.

My buddy Neal-O came over tonight and we worked on some music. I'm kinda hung up writing one song; my inspiration for it has been quite engulfing. We're currently working on no less than three versions of it, ranging from alt-country to reggae to blues/soul. As they say, the truth surely lies somewhere in the middle. We also worked on a remake of one of our original blues/jazz instrumentals, which turned out quite nicely.

In related news, I'm still playing on Monday and Wednesday nights at Brackins Blues club in Maryville (when I'm at home), so come by and show us some love if you happen to be around.

Next stop, Skyscraper National Forest.

G'night, information superhighway...

Books, the weather, and Geminis

So one of my friends got a book deal a couple of weeks ago... for a book that is not yet written. He's never even written anything but a thesis before, and obviously never had anything published. I asked him what I have to do to get a book deal. He told me to write one. I explained to him that I don't have the first clue what to write about, because "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenence" has already been written. And then I reminded him that he has a Ph.D. And he said. "Oh."

Thanks for the help, Doctor.

And that reminds me- I had a roommate who was doing some computer work at the Sundance Festival a few years ago, and was approached by a certain famous director and told that he had "a look we've been searching for." He was then given a few phone numbers, and in a couple of weeks was in New York staying in a penthouse suite while he auditioned for a co-star role with Sean Connery. He had never acted before in his entire life, except to get laid....

They sent him the script, and I'm reading it, thinking, "Wow. This is a BIG budget movie, and they're bringing in some complete unknown from Tennessee to co-star in it." They were offering him $2mil up front, plus a draw off of the box revenue. I know this because I had to pretend to be his representation for a couple of days while he was out of town and the phone was ringing off the hook. I tried to give him a crash course in acting before the second round of auditions, teaching him to be aware of body language, vocal inflections, etc.... I told him to make sure to get me in as an extra and get one of my songs on the soundtrack as part of his contract.

He ultimately didn't get the role due to his lack of experience, but it was close. It came down to him and the kid who finally got it. You probably saw the movie.

Moving right along... I'm wondering what exactly god has against me riding my motorcycles. I went to Cali (where I don't have a bike) for the weekend, and the weather was warm and beautiful both there and at home. I come home and go to work this morning, and it starts SNOWING. And the forecast ain't lookin good for this week. What gives?

...and I'm hoping a certain Gemini cheers up soon. Hi there. GIT 'ER DONE!!!

-t

The Christening

Oooooookay. I tried this crap once before, but found out that I generally stay way too busy to remember to post. So here we go again.

tjayswift v2.0 - I promise I'll try harder this time.....

I've toyed around with a few different ideas as far as what kind of stuff I'm going to cover, and in what detail. Ideas ranged from a humorously cynical social and political commentary (but there's way too many of those) to a chronicle of my travels and adventures to pure nonsensical abstract comedic babble. But after much thought (okay, like 10 minutes, max) I think the best approach is probably going to be to just see what happens and run with it. I know I'm going to get some traffic from my moto-buddies, and my guitar friends, and my computer-geek-ish work friends, so I'm probably not going to go into much detail about things like chain and sprocket wear, the finer points of adding a jazz turnaround to a standard blues tune, or why my iBook logic board crapped out on me again.... That was a completely epic run-on sentence.

I'm not big on the whole "My name is Bubba, I'm 34 years old, I work as a blah blah....," but it would seem logical that some form of an introduction is in order. So I'll keep it simple-

I'm a young professional. I travel for a living. I have way too many hobbies to list, but surely most all of them will come up at one point or another.



Here are the rules I plan to at least semi-adhere to (these rules may be ratified, amended, or wholly disregarded without warning at anytime by the author):

1) All content will be the true story. Or at least only embellished or modified for the greater good of mankind, i.e. to protect the innocent, to protect my job, or to enhance the post's entertainment value.

2) I will only brag and/or boast about things I've really done.

3) The actions and/or comments of friends and aquaintances will be faithfully reproduced from my memory, as I recall at the time of writing.* Therefore, you are hereby advised to never say or do anything in my presence that you would not like your mother to read. Actually, you probably shouldn't do that stuff anytime.

*- Exception- Certain protective rights and privileges are extended to those with whom I am currently sleeping. Thus, if I have posted true information about you that you would like modified or removed, then you or your significant other must sleep with me in order to have said content modified or removed. That's just how it works.

4) I will make a conscious effort not to bore my visitors, and to update in a semi-regular, timely manner.

5) I will not use the likenesses and/or real names of any persons without said persons' prior consent.

6) All feedback will be sincerely appreciated and replied to, if appropriate. Unless you are just being an ass.

7) This little hole in the internet will be kept mostly work-safe. Language and images will be moderated in a fashion compliant with prime-time cable TV standards. Unless it's just *really* funny. Then I'll probably precede the post with a disclaimer.

That is all. More to come.

-t